134. Caitlin Zick // Sexual Health and Wholeness

Caitlin Zick had a profound moment at the age of sixteen where God called her out of a crowd and her life was forever changed. From that moment, she began to discover who she was as a daughter of God, fall in love with Jesus, and realize the power of the Holy Spirit in her life. Caitlin and her husband Cole became directors of Moral Revolution in 2017 and openly share their marriage story and first years of sex in marriage to start a healthy conversation and begin to unfold God’s design of sex. They have been married and in full-time ministry for eleven years and are parents to 4 children.

Tune into this episode as Caitlin shares on God’s original design for sexuality, how to find wholeness from sexual shame, how to talk to kids about sex and more!

Bible Verses:

James 5:16 “Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.”

1 Corinthians 7:1-5 “Now, getting down to the questions you asked in your letter to me. First, Is it a good thing to have sexual relations? Certainly—but only within a certain context. It’s good for a man to have a wife, and for a woman to have a husband. Sexual drives are strong, but marriage is strong enough to contain them and provide for a balanced and fulfilling sexual life in a world of sexual disorder. The marriage bed must be a place of mutuality—the husband seeking to satisfy his wife, the wife seeking to satisfy her husband. Marriage is not a place to “stand up for your rights.” Marriage is a decision to serve the other, whether in bed or out.”

Psalm 101:3 “I will not look with approval on anything that is vile. I hate what faithless people do; I will have no part in it.”

Topics Discussed

Introduction

Caitlin grew up in a Catholic home, but she met Jesus when she was a teenager.
Caitlin’s life drastically changed after she started following Jesus.
Caitlin met her husband when she was a senior. While they were dating, they dreamed about leading a purity ministry together one day.

Moral Revolution

Caitlin and her husband began leading a ministry focused on purity called Moral Revolution.
Moral Revolution was started in 2009 by Kris Vallotton. This ministry was based on a book he wrote with the same title.
Moral Revolution has curriculum for youth groups.
They have courses for parents called Parent Well.
Moral Revolution has books for parents to read with their kids of all ages starting at the age of 3.
They have ministries for single people and married couples, as well as the LGTBQ community.

God’s Original Design for Sex

We are subconsciously being trained by what we are entertained by.
So much of your perspective about sex is probably perversion and the world’s version of it and not God’s idea of it.
Within the church sex has been shamed or silenced.
Statistically we are living in a generation that has been assaulted by pornography. Kids at the age of 8 are finding and watching porn.
God created sex on purpose because it is such a powerful bonding agent between two people.
We need to talk about sex so that we can create a healthy culture around it.

Finding Healing

Your healing is on the other side of confession.
Confess what is broken to someone.
What’s hidden will haunt us.
Who you confess to matters. You need a righteous person to tell you what you need to hear, not what you want to hear.
Healing is not linear.
It is never too late to receive healing.

Stewarding Healthy Sex in Marriage

Sex should be between a man and a woman who are married.
Sex should be fulfilling to both partners.
The marriage bed should be a place where the husband and wife are seeking to satisfy each other.
A healthy sex life is both the husband and wife being satisfied and happy.
It is important to talk about sex with your spouse.
Sex is not a performance. Sex is a discovery together to create intimacy and bonding.

Making Sex More Fun

Sexpectations cards from moralrevolution.com
Set your mind up for it.
Be intentional
Scheduled sex is better than no sex.

Protecting Your Mind

We are called to be set apart.
It’s not legalistic to guard your mind and your eyes.
We need to guard our hearts and guard our eyes.
Watching things that depict raunchy or abusive way is affecting you.
It is important to raise the standard on what we are willing to watch.

Teaching Your Children to Protect Their Minds

Your children will copy what you model.
Teach your children to look at the lyrics of songs.
You don’t just want to tell your kids no, you want to teach them how to say no for themselves.
Defend Young Minds and Protect Young Eyes ministries have great tools for parents.
We cannot assume our children won’t see porn.
It is important for parents to reaffirm their child’s identity and who they are in Christ.

Powerful Quotes:

“We are subconsciously being trained by what we are entertained by.” – Cailtin Zick

“There is no reputation beyond God’s redemption.” – Caitlin Zick

“Your healing is on the other side of confession.” – Caitlin Zick

“Don’t settle for less than God’s best.” – Caitlin Zick

“Sex is a discovery together to create intimacy and bonding.” – Caitlin Zick

“As a church, we have begun to forfeit holiness in an attempt to avoid legalism.” – Caitlin Zick

“We have to be intentional to turn up the truth about sex.” – Caitlin Zick

Resources:

Raised on Porn documentary on Youtube

Recovery from Porn and Affairs resources from Moral Revolution

Intimate Issues by Linda Dillow